I tell you my secret

Do you know when I act so stout
actually I hiding my crumbly
do you know when I so hard
actually I hiding my soft side

Because I don't want anyone feel sorry about me
because I don't want any attention from this
because I want see who can see through me

Are you really believe when I say never, that no chance?
are you really believe when I said impossible, that no possibility?
you just see the outside, judge me
it really hurt me

When I said never you just step back and stay
when I said impossible, you doing nothing even waiting
if you see me, the real me
you will know I ask you wait for me
you will know I want you like crazy
you will know I need you badly
you will know I defending from fall for you
you will know I am nothing without you
you will know I die when there is no you

But you so blind, you never know that
but you so arrogant, just judge from the outside
but you always like that, maybe much better I step back
I waiting for time, when I never see you anymore
I will forget you a little bit, then a little more
until someday it be no feeling more

Why you so blind? I already show you
why you so arrogant? I always ask you to stay
why you just like that? you hurt me

maybe that why we will never be together
you can't understand me
and I clumsy, can't fit with you
if someday you realize, it already late
but yes, I was love you

Nov 7th, 2014

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Dummy reality

Your act give me hope
hope you hold me tight
and never let me go
hope you going crazy about me
hope you come and get me
hope you just think about me
yes, I do
I hope that can be real

You right in front of me
but not real you, you so far from me
you right in front of my eye
but not me in your eye

You love me but ask me out
you want me but keep a distance
do you think about me? I hesitate

Are you playing this feeling, my feeling
if you love me, say it
are you playing this feeling, my feeling
if you hate me, call it

Sometime you like want me
at the same time you pull me out
sometime you give me a more then friend attention
at the same time you just not noticing

You make me confuse
I don't know what to do
you pull me up when I step back
I really don't know what I should do
you push me when I go forward

Just tell me the truth
can I make it through
or just enough
I can't wait so stout

Nov 7th. 2014

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Mistake

First time I meet you
You tell me all your suffer
how people around you threat you
I sorry about that
infect that mistake

After I know you
I understand why people threat you like that
nobody be bad to anyone unless you do bad thing
no one hurt anybody unless you hurt them first
you must be have done some mistake

you change your self and loss your way
then you ask me too, but I will never do that
you never have no idea how I made this far
you just cross on my way, don't ruin it
that a mistake

I care about your problem
I care about you
but force me throw away my self
who are you
you just a mistake

Everybody have problem, they are suffer
Some people solve it, some just run away
but that make them through their life
So do you, you already do that
but never ever ask me do whatever you already do
you have a mistake

You have your way, go ahead
I have my way, don't disturb that
all your is always your
but force me do what you do
I'm not you
do you know where the mistake

Now I know why nobody don't care about you
now I know why you so pathetic
now I know that care about you is big mistake

You are hopeless and helpless
because you always act know everything but you are not
just judge but never dig deeper
do you know what your mistake

You are hopeless and helpless
so I do like people around you before
stay away from you, and reject you
hope you realize where your mistake

Oct 29th - Nov 1st 2014

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To: My fake friends

We maybe ever have story
but it already end
We maybe ever laugh together
but it never gonna happen again

Because everything is not real
because you are fake
and everything happen just illusion

You always ask all you want like you understand well
but not
you act like know me, expose me
but you are not

what do you want?
everything attention?
take it
but not by humiliation me

I much better without you who always bothering my way
I much better without you who ask me be somebody not me
I much better without you who think know everything

You are wrong
loosing me is your big mistake, honey
you already know now that

Then you know you can't loss me
and you ask me to give a damn attention
you want to approaching me again
I will always give you a fake smile whenever I want
just not all the time
begging for that, my fake friend

I much better without you who always bothering my way
I much better without you who ask me be somebody not me
I much better without you who think know everything

You already choose and you are loose
take it enjoy it and worth it
you walk in your way and so do I
never cross my way anymore
just stay away from me
you discomfort me

I know the real you
smiling hope get any attention, hopeless
I know the real you, your kind for a purpose
and all people already know that
I know the real you, so don't be fake
pathetic

Begging me on your knee
will never make me forgiving you
liar is always liar

Are you really a human
every inch of you is not real
my suggestion from the rest of my care
stay away from me and enjoy your fake

I much better without you who always bothering my way
I much better without you who ask me be somebody not me
I much better without you who think know everything

Oct 29th - Nov 1st 2014

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Some more time

I didn't sad when you go
it's not hurt me when you not told me
I keep my mind firth then my heart
because I know that everything is fine
I just want you to explain and give some more time

You just go with somebody when you wish
you never ask me to stay or anything
I don't know what are you thinking
You just never talk to me even look at me
I really need some more time for me

I guest it already end, you grab somebody else
look at me with no feeling once
your feeling just gone like the ashes
you go without any word like dust
Are your time for me bet didn't worth

Am I hurt you or you just found somebody who much better then me
but whatever it is you gone and make me keep looking
you just enough to do whatever you do already
take another girl and turn from me, can't make me stop asking
Can I have time from you to explaining

I hold my heart in both of hand, it is just broken but will be well soon
It fragile now, every touch crush it like a mirror
I just need time some more

I want to throw this heart because every beat make me suffer
Even die not make me sure that I'll be better
I just need some more time to make everything better then ever

October 12th, 2014

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Willing you

It hurt when I can see you and I cant touch you
you walk through me like we never know each other before
I know you decided to move on and forget our story
and leave me behind

I said to my self to be strong
I don't need try to understand all the reason you never told me
I don't know is that real or just a dream
everything just gone, so do you
nothing left

I said to my self everything will be OK
I can learn much thing
like sweet dream will end when you up
like glass will broken because too hot
like every story will gone someday

Our story already end, I learn to admit it
I try to stand on my own feet
Life on the crowded try to fit
Maybe help a little bit

October 12th, 2014

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Event 3030, Masa depan dimulai saat ini - Bali

Awalnya admin g tw apa itu 3030 tapi karena tampaknya keren dan tiket masuknya gratis jadi ya udah.... hehehehe :D

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